


how to hurt

by Leafspeaks



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Headaches & Migraines, Hurt/Comfort, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Pain, Sick Character, Sickfic, Vomiting, all relationships written with platonic intentions, but interpret as you wish, but this became seungmin/hyunjin focused somehow, felix and seungmin are the softest duo in skz this is not up for debate, some actual character development maybe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 13:08:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28849578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leafspeaks/pseuds/Leafspeaks
Summary: seungmin thinks hiding his migraine is a good idea.  hyunjin would beg to differ.cw: graphic depictions of vomit
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin & Kim Seungmin, Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Kim Seungmin & Lee Felix, Kim Seungmin & Yang Jeongin | I.N, Kim Seungmin/Lee Felix
Comments: 18
Kudos: 69





	how to hurt

**Author's Note:**

> this was [from a request i got on tumblr](https://pips-fics.tumblr.com)! feel free to [send me more asks](https://pips-fics.tumblr.com/ask) if there's something you'd like to see written! :)

one might say that seungmin was in a certain amount of pain by the time he got back from recording at the studio. one might say, in fact, that he was in excruciating pain. one might say that if he didn’t do something quick, his head might explode.

seungmin would not be saying any of that.

the thing is, he had promised a handful of his members that he would go with them on a picnic. not only that, he’d made them earn it by doing him favors around the dorm for a whole two days straight. he might be strategic with allocating his time, but seungmin wasn’t cruel enough to just abandon them after all of that. so he helped jeongin gather supplies, and reminded hyunjin to bring his sunglasses, and walked out the door with felix wrapped around his shoulders and two metaphorical hammers pounding on his temples. he could hardly see straight, but he figured that was part of the benefit of felix’s lack of regard for body space - he could pretty much let felix guide his feet at this point, even if he closed his eyes. which, as they stepped into the glaring sunlight and seungmin realized he’d managed to forget his own sunglasses, actually didn’t seem like a horrible idea.

“-gmin! seungminnie?”

seungmin’s steps jolted unsteadily as hyunjin’s voice sent pain through him like lightning. felix unwrapped his arms but kept a steadying hand on seungmin’s shoulder. even jeongin looked moderately concerned.

“you okay?” felix asked.

“fine,” seungmin said, a bit too quickly. hyunjin’s eyes narrowed.

“did you sleep last night?”

“of course.” the _chan’s the one who doesn’t sleep_ was implied.

“are you sick?”

“i am healthy.”

“did something happen at the recording?”

“no. it was just long.” it wasn’t, was the thing. he’d been pretty proud of how he’d done, all things considered, his desperation to be home as soon as possible helping him to outperform even his own expectations. but now even that was working against him.

the tenseness stayed in hyunjin’s shoulders, but there wasn’t much else he could do, so he let it go. seungmin was glad. he didn’t really feel like talking, especially now that felix had deliberately given him some space (a kind gesture, but not necessary) and he had to focus on finding the correct way using his own eyes.

it would be fine once they got there. he’d find a nice, quiet spot in the shade and pretend to eat and then maybe take a nap. but when they actually got there, hyunjin was keeping too close an eye on him. seungmin needed to eat something if he wanted to prove that he was okay, so he picked up a cracker - he figured it that would be a good place to start, to help his stomach and head prepare themselves.

this was a bad idea, it turned out. the nausea increased tenfold almost immediately, and his vision swam even more intensely. sweat warmed his already-overheating neck and it took all of seungmin’s willpower to avoid curling into the fetal position right there and then. he took a few deep breaths and his stomach settled somewhat, but just slightly. hyunjin looked away with a scowl, and guilt settled in the space the nausea had left. it felt… worse.

the thing is: he hadn’t lied. not exactly. but he felt like he had. he knew, once the rest of them found out, that hyunjin would think so, too. he kept his mouth shut and his head down for the rest of the picnic, letting felix and jeongin’s chatter wash over him. hyunjin was nearly as quiet as seungmin, until they finished eating.

“let’s go back,” hyunjin said, as soon as felix finished his last bite. this was surprising to felix and jeongin, who had been anticipating a much longer outing - seungmin had even helped jeongin find some playing cards to pack. seungmin was the only one who had noticed that hyunjin was really upset. that was because he was the person hyunjin was upset at.

he trudged along, steps slow and painful - even more so than on the way to the picnic - trying not to be stung by how eager hyunjin seemed to leave him in the dust. felix squeezed his hand, and smiled, before darting ahead and chatting loudly with jeongin about video games.

seungmin didn’t know what it was that set him off. the guilt or the noise or the sun or - probably - all of it together. all of a sudden, his hands were on his knees and he was retching, loudly, and then there was hot liquid burning his throat and nostrils and splattering on the sidewalk. he shuddered, and was sick again before he even really knew what was happening.

hyunjin was the first person to seungmin’s side. of course he was - he’d known something was off. “you _are_ sick!” seungmin listened for accusation in his tone, and found only concern. and maybe a bit of frustration.

“no,” seungmin said, gasping. “head - hurts.” he was seeing stars. he couldn’t stop retching, now that he’d started.

“your sunglasses— where are— ah, you forgot them? kim seungmin, how irresponsible,” nerves, this time, in hyunjin’s voice, an anxious kind of humor. “take mine.”

“i didn’t lie,” seungmin slurred. he hardly knew what he was saying anymore, he was in so much pain, but he knew that was important. he couldn’t hear what hyunjin said in return, but saw him shake his head - with anger? seungmin didn’t know, couldn’t read faces anymore - before he half-carried him to the dorm elevator, with jeongin’s help. felix, squeamish to his core, took the stairs on his own.

the elevator ride was painful. not just because the bright lights made seungmin’s head hurt even worse, but because he could feel hyunjin’s eyes on him the whole time. he was glad to step out, and was even more grateful to be home, as he entered the dorm somewhat unsteadily.

“woah,” someone said. jisung, seungmin thought. “you guys are back already?”

“he has a migraine,” someone said. not hyunjin, because hyunjin was still, surprisingly, with seungmin, so he couldn’t be too angry. right? with the world spinning before his eyes, it was too much for seungmin to really figure out. he gripped hyunjin’s arm tightly and let him lead seungmin to his bed.

seungmin sat there in a daze, staring vacantly at the floor as hyunjin rushed around the room, turning lights off and shutting the blinds. dropping his head to his hands as if it weight hundreds of pounds, seungmin made some kind of pitiful whimpering sound and cut off an audible heave. acidic sick splashed back into his throat and he swallowed it down, hoping to avoid a mess. his stomach suddenly felt very bloated and the nausea worsened as his throat worked to keep the vile liquid down.

seungmin was surprised when a plastic trash can appeared in his hands. a water belch rolled out of him, and with it, a rush of vomit. he coughed, and an all-encompassing pain overtook him, followed by another violent heave. this time, very little came up, a thin spray splattering the sides of the garbage bin. seungmin didn’t notice he was shaking until hyunjin reached out a hand to steady him.

“are you done?” hyunjin asked very quietly.

“i think,” seungmin croaked. hyunjin took the soiled trash can away, and seungmin tried not to scream out as he attempted to find a comfortable position. every tiny movement was a form of self-torture.

he was surprised when hyunjin came back. it felt like hours passed before he did, and he felt tears jump to his eyes unsolicited when he returned. “i’m sorry,” seungmin blurted out.

hyunjin frowned, and seungmin was confused again. “don’t talk, just rest for now.”

“i didn’t want to ruin the picnic,” seungmin forged on, and now hyunjin looked confused.

“you didn’t.”

“yes, i—“

“is that why you didn’t tell us what was going on sooner?” hyunjin interrupted, his voice even quieter than it had been.

“yes?” seungmin blinked spots from his eyes. they were distracting. “are you angry?”

“no!” that was a bit louder than hyunjin intended, and seungmin winced. “sorry, no. i was just worried, and i thought… well, i was a bit hurt.”

seungmin’s eyes widened and hyunjin shrugged.

“i thought by now you’d trust us enough to tell us if you’re hurting.”

“i do! i just thought…”

“that we’d rather enjoy ourselves in ignorant bliss while you suffered for our happiness?” hyunjin shook his head. “that hurts us, too, seungmin.”

tears welled in seungmin’s eyes, and hyunjin looked like he wanted to take the words back.

“but i’m not mad! i’m not even upset anymore. i know you weren’t thinking straight, minnie, i just, i want to know how i can do more to help you next time. but that can wait. we’ll talk more when you’re feeling better, okay? i’m not mad.”

“okay,” seungmin’s voice sounded small, even to his own ears. hyunjin got up from the bed, then hesitated.

“do you want— can i stay?”

seungmin’s instinct was to say there was no need, to push hyunjin away, to act like he wanted to be alone. but he didn’t. he wanted someone to hold his hand and maybe give him a back rub, and here was hyunjin, offering to be here.

“please,” seungmin said, reaching out a hand.

**Author's Note:**

> i know that leaving comments can be stressful and difficult for a million different reasons, so here are some short, copy-and-paste comments which are 110% acceptable to use if you'd like to provide me with some encouragement, but don't have the time or energy to come up with your own:
> 
> 1) "Just read this for a second time!”  
> 2) “I loved this!”  
> 2) “<3″  
> 4) “This was great!”  
> 5) “One of my favorites!”  
> 6) “Extra kudos!”  
> 7) Reply to another comment with “all of this!″ or “+1″  
> 8) “Will definitely recommend this!”  
> 9) “This was my favorite part: [paste quote]”  
> 10) “Thanks for writing this!”
> 
> still don't want to leave a comment? no worries! i hope you enjoyed the story nonetheless!
> 
> if you'd like to see me write something else, feel free to send requests! you can also send me mail [through my tumblr account](https://pips-fics.tumblr.com/ask) :)


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